Last night I put my hand to my heart. I don’t know why it landed there but after a deep breath or two, I felt its beat and was startled with wonder. There is an actual heart beating life through this body.
This was the first year I have felt fully alive, fully present, fully me. This was the year that stretched me out, my head, my heart, my arms. This was the year I stepped into true listening, discerning, obedience. This was the year that brought rest in knowing who I am and who I am called to be.
[one_half]In year 38, I learned:
- To chase down opportunities to offer Gospel and Grace…in conflict and in peace.
- To keep my eyes open to seeing, feeling, believing, and remaining in His presence.
- To listen, really listen, to the people in front of me. To listen for even the smallest of invitations.
- To desire to know people, accurately and truthfully; to take time to understand the how, what and why of who they are; to see them.
- To choose my words wisely, to mean what I say, to only speak if it really adds value; to hold my tongue and be sure I am not just adding to the noise of thousands of other people who need to say something.
- To accept running the race set before me, even if it means walking away from something good.
- To believe in the finishing and perfecting, that glory comes in obedience and refining.
- To be. Ministry, love, light, grace, peace, aware, active, present, available, willing.[/one_half] [one_half_last]
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[/one_half_last]Six questions I am [actively] asking myself in my 39th year:
- In conflict, am I pushing for His agenda (or am I putting my own spin on it), am I truly approaching this conflict with grace (or am I calling it grace)? In peace, am I seeking and searching for opportunities to show and share the love of Jesus?
- Stop, look, listen. His presence is very real. Where am I seeing, feeling, believing and remaining in it? Where aren’t I?
- Am I really listening or am I distracted with what I need/want to say in response? Is there an invitation here? How do I respond?
- How can I grow in relationship with the people in my circles? How can I seek to know them better? How do I get outside of myself and be intentional with understanding [and having compassion for] others?
- Does want I have to say add to the distraction that is overflowing in our culture? Does what I have to say give meaning or show purpose? Am I speaking to be heard, to be relevant, to be self-serving? Choose my words carefully.
- Is this the path that will get me to where I am sensing He is leading/calling me to go? If it isn’t, do not let it weigh me down. If it is, accept it and run.
- Is this tension/struggle/refining/obedience bringing glory? How is it manifest?
- Am I being ministry, love, light, grace, peace, aware, active, present, available, willing in the spaces I am placed in? How can I do any (or all) better?
I don’t know what you are asking yourself this year in your life. But friend, do not miss the opportunity to ask, press, dig, stretch, question, grow, give and love. You’ll find that glory is all around if your eyes are opened to it. Who would want to miss that?
